雅思写作7分分析2016年雅思写作7分范文分析学习雅思范文的写作可以帮助自己更好地提高写作能力，下面小编就给大家带来一篇雅思7分范文，附含点评和解析，希望考生能有所收获!雅思范文——老龄化快速增长的优缺点：Inmanycountries,thenumberofelderlypeopleisincreasingfast.Towhatextentdothedisadvantagesoutweightheadvantages?Nowadays,owningtotheimprovementoflivingcondition(这里习惯用复数),peoplecanlivemuchlongerthanbefore,whichgivesrisetothefastincreasingnumberofelderlypeople.Someholdthatthissituationwillresultinaseriesofproblems,suchassocialburden,populationexpansionandsoon.Whileothersinsistthatitagreesthedevelopmentofmodernsocietyandbringsmanyadvantages.Formypart,Itakethelattersidewith(用for)thefollowingreasons:(74words)点评：开头稍微写的有点长，不过内容写的还不错。属于通过分析两种不同观点，最后阐述自己观点的写法。(此种写法在雅思大作文的第一段比较常见)美中不足的是倒数第二句的错误比较明显!while是个连词，应该连接句子与句子，所以这里前面不应该是句号。后面agree是不及物动词，不能直接加宾语。Firstly,elderpeople(一会儿elderlypeople,一会儿又elderpeople，这不是自相矛盾么!!!)arethefortuneofoursociety.Theyhaveenoughexperiencesandcapabilitieswhicharebadlylackedandneededforouryouthwhendealingwithallsortsofproblems,theycanstilldowellintheirjobs.Especially(前面应该用逗号，然后这里小写)insomeprofessions,suchasteacher,doctor,scientistandsoon,sometimes(前面应该用句号，然后这里大写)agemeanstheauthorityandability.Whenyouseeadoctor,doyoupreferanelderlydoctorwithgreyhairorayouthwithoutmustache?(77words)Secondly,elderpeople(同上)arethehappinessofoursociety.Increasingnumberofelderlypeopleisalsotheembodimentofourimprovinglivingquality,whichshowsoursocietyrun(应该第三人称单数)totherightandhealthydirection,we(前面句号，这里大写)havemorechanceandtimetoserveourelderlypeople,andit’sthehappiesttimeofallourlifetoaccompanywith(accompany是及物动词)ourparents,grandparentsandgreatgrandparents.(63words)Finally,elderlypeoplearethelubricantofoursociety.Theyhavegoodtemperandenoughpatients(应该是patience吧)todoanything,theycanhelpustointercede(它是不及物动词，而且主要用人作宾语)socialdisputes,andtheymakeoursocietymuchmoreharmoniouswhich(前面最好有个逗号)makesfortheconstructionofharmonioussociety.(43words)正文段综合点评：此篇是典型的5段式作文的写作，正文段构思出三个分论点来证明自己的观点，的确在构思上花了不少心思。但是，这里我想提的是，还是两方面都分析一下会比较好一点。特别这篇文章是问优点多还是缺点多，那么最好是缺点讲一个，然