UNTH1TEXTItishumorousessay.Butafterreadingityouwillsurelyfindthattheauthorismostseriousinwritingit.TsThereLifeonEarth?TherewasgreatexcitementontheplanetofVenusthisweek.ForthefirsttimeVenusianscientistsmanagedtolandasatelliteontheplantEarth,andishasbeensendingbacksignalsaswellasphotographseversince.ThesatellitewasdirectedintoanareaknowasManhattan(namedafterthegreatVenusianastronomerProf.Manhattan,whofirstdiscovereditwithhistelescope20,000lightyearsago).Becauseofexcellentweatherconditionsandextremelystrongsignals,VenusianscientistswereabletogetvaluableinformationastothefeasibilityofamannedflyingsaucerlandingonEarth.ApressconferencewasheldattheVenusInstituteofTechnology."Wehavecometotheconclusion,basedonlastweek'ssatellitelanding,"Prof.Zogsaid,"thatthereisnolifeonEarth.""Howdoyouknowthis?"thesciencereporteroftheVenusEveningStarasked."Foronething,Earth'ssurfaceintheareaofManhattaniscomposedofsolidconcreteandnothingcangrowthere.Foranother,theatmosphereisfilledwithcarbonmonoxideandotherdeadlygasesandnobodycouldpossiblybreatherthisairandsurvive.""Whatdoesthismeanasfarasourflyingsauceprogramisconcerned?""Weshallhavetotakeourownoxygenwithus,whichmeansamuchheavierflyingsaucerthanweoriginallyplanned.""Arethereanyotherhazardsthatyoudiscoveredinyourstudier?""Takealookatthisphoto.YouseethisdarkblackcloudhoveringoverthesurfaceofEarth?WecallthistheConsolidatedEdisonBelt.Wedon'tknowwhatitismadeof,butitcouldgiveusalotoftroubleandweshallhavetomakefurthertestsbeforewesendaVenusBeingthere.""Overhereyouwillnoticewhatseemstobeariver,butthesatellitefindingsindicateitispollutedandthewaterisunfittodrink.Thismeansweshallhavetocarryourownwater,whichwilladdevengreaterweighttothesaucer.""Sir,whatareallthosetinyblackspotsonthephotographs?""We'renotcertain.Theyseemtobemetalparticlesthatmovealongcertainpaths.Theyemitgases,makenoiseandkeepcrashingintoeachother.Therearesomanyofthesepathsandsomanymetalparti