英语小笑话三则One、He'sjustBeentotheZooWhenIwaswaittinginlineatthebank,Inoticedawomanholdingasmallchildatoneofthewindows.Theboywaseatingaroll,whichhethrustattheteller.Thetellersmiledandshookhishead."No,no,dear,"saidtheboy'smom.andthen,turnningtotheteller,"Ibegyourpardon,youngman.Pleaseforgivemyson.He'sjustbeentothezoo."他刚去过动物园当我在银行里排队时，发现一位妇女抱着一个小孩站在一个窗口。男孩正在吃一个面包卷，并将面包卷戳向出纳员，出纳员笑着摇了摇头。“别这样，亲爱的，”男孩的妈妈说。然后她转向出纳员说，“对不起，小伙子。请原谅我的儿子，他刚去过动物园。”Two、IknowIcouldcountonyouSmithgoestoseehisbossinthefrontoffice."Boss,"hesays:"we'redoingsomeheavyhouse-cleaningathometomorrow,andmywifeneedsmetohelpwiththeattic（阁楼）andthegarage.""We'reshort-handed,Smith."thebossreplies."Ican'tgiveyouthedayoff.""Thanks,boss,"saysSmith,"IknowIcouldcountonyou!"我就知道你会帮我史密斯去找他的老板。“老板，我们家明天有很重的工作要做，我妻子让我修阁楼和车库。”“可我们很缺人，史密斯。”老板答道，“我不可能放你的假。”“谢谢，老板。”史密斯说，“我就知道你会帮我。”Three、GrandpawillpaythebillWalkinguptoadepartmentstore'sfabric（织物，布）counter,theprettygirlsaid,"Iwouldliketobuythismaterialforanewdress.Howmuchdoesitcost?""Onlyonekissperyard,"repliedthemaleclerkwithasmirk（假笑，傻笑）."That'sfine,"saidthegirl."I'lltaketenyards."Withexpectationandanticipationwrittenalloverhisface,theclerkquicklymeasuredoutthecloth,wrappeditup,thenteasingly（故意使人烦恼地）helditout.Thegirlsnappedupthepackage,pointedtotheoldgeezer（老家伙）standingbesideher,andsmiled,"Grandpawillpaythebill."爷爷给我付账一个漂亮的女孩走到百货公司的布料柜台，说：“我想要买这种料子来做一条新裙子，多少钱？”“每码只需要一个吻。”男售货员说着，带着奸笑的表情“很好，”女孩说，“我要十码。”带着期待的表情，售货员很快地量好了布料，包裹好，一脸奸笑地送了过来。女孩很快收起了包裹，微笑着指向了一个站在她身边的老头：“爷爷给我付账。”