英语笑话短文小1.WeatherPredictAfilmcrewwasonlocationdeepinthedesert.OnedayanoldIndianwentuptothedirectorandsaid,"Tomorrowrain."Thenextdayitrained.Aweeklater,theIndianwentuptothedirectorandsaid,"Tomorrowstorm."Thenextdaytherewasahailstorm."ThisIndianisincredible,"saidthedirector.HetoldhissecretarytohiretheIndiantopredicttheweather.However,afterseveralsuccessfulpredictions,theoldIndiandidn'tshowupfortwoweeks.Finallythedirectorsentforhim."Ihavetoshootabigscenetomorrow,"saidthedirector,"andI'mdependingonyou.Whatwilltheweatherbelike?"TheIndianshruggedhisshoulders."Don'tknow,"hesaid."Radioisbroken."天气预报一个电影摄制组在沙漠深处工作.一天,一个印度老人到导演跟前告诉导演说"明天下雨."第二天果然下雨了.一周后,印度人又来告诉导演说,"明天有风暴."果然,第二天下了雹暴."印度人真神,"导演说.他告诉秘书雇佣该印度人来预报天气.几次预报都很成功.然后,接下来的两周,印度人不见了.最后,导演派人去把他叫来了."我明天必须拍一个很大的场景,"导演说,"这得靠你了.明天天气如何啊?"印度人耸了耸肩."我不知道,"印度人说,"收音机坏了."2.HowmuchEnglishcanyouspeak?"YourHonor,Iwanttobringtoyourattentionhowunfairitisformyclienttobeaccusedoftheft.HearrivedinNewYorkCityaweekagoandbarelyknewhiswayaround.What'smore,heonlyspeaksafewwordsofEnglish."Thejudgelookedatthedefendantandasked,"HowmuchEnglishcanyouspeak?"Thedefendantlookedupandsaid,"Givemeyourwallet!"中文翻译"法官先生，我的当事人被指控偷窃，这是多么不公正啊。他一周前才来到纽约，几乎不认路。而且，他只会说几个英语单词。"法官看了看被告，问道："你会说多少英文?"被告抬起头，说："把你的钱包给我!"3.Ahusband,provingtohiswifethatwomentalkmorethanmen,showedherastudywhichindicatedthatmenuseonaverageonly15000wordsaday,whereaswomenuse30000wordsaday.Shethoughtaboutthisforawhileandthentoldherhusbandthatwomenusetwiceasmanywordsasmenbecausetheyhavetorepeateverythingtheysay.Hesaid,"What?"丈夫给妻子看了一项调查结果，为了向她证明女人比男人啰嗦。研究表明男人平均每天使用15000个字，而女人每天使用30000个。妻子想了一会儿说，女人每天说的字数是男人的两倍，因为她们必须重复已经说过的话。他问："什么?"4.Boy:Isthisseatempty?Girl:Yes,andthisonewillbeifyousitdown.男孩：这个座位是空的么?女孩：是的，如果你坐下，我的座位也将是空的。5."Tom,what'sthematterwithyourbrother?"askedthemotherinthekitchen."He'scrying.""Oh,nothing,Mum,"repliedTom."I'meatingmycake.HeiscryingbecauseIwon'tgivehimany.""Buthashefinishedhisowncake?""Yes."saidTom."AndhealsocriedwhenIwashelpinghimfinishthat.""汤姆，你弟弟怎么了?"妈妈在厨房里问。"他在哭。""没