English jokes.ppt
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English jokes.ppt

Englishjokes.ppt

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Enjoyjokes!DrunkOneday,afatherandhislittlesonweregoinghome.Atthisage,theboywasinterestedinallkindsofthingsandwasalwaysaskingquestions.Now,heasked,"What'sthemeaningoftheword'Drunk',dad?""Well,myson,"hisfatherreplied,"look,therearestandingtwopolicemen.IfIregardthetwopolicemenasfourthenIamdrunk.""But,dad,"theboysaid,"there'sonlyONEpoliceman!"醉酒一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?”“唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。”“可是,爸爸,”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”②HospitalityThehostessapologizedtoherunexpectedguestforservinganapple-piewithoutanycheese.Thelittleboyofthefamilylefttheroomquietlyforamomentandreturnedwithapieceofcheesewhichhelaidontheguest'splate.Thevisitorsmiled,putthecheeseintohismouthandthensaid:"Youmusthavebettereyesthanyourmother,sonny.Wheredidyoufindthecheese?""Intherat-trap,sir,"repliedtheboy.好客由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?”“在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。③NestandHairMysister,aprimaryschoolteacher,wasinformedbyoneofherpupilsthatabirdhadbuiltitsnestinthetreeoutsidetheclassroom."Whatkindofbird?"mysisterasked."Ididn'tseethebird,madam,onlythenest,"repliedthechild."Then,canyougiveusadescriptionofthenest?"mysisterencouragedher."Well,madam,itjustresemblesyourhair.鸟窝与头发我姐姐是一位小学老师。一次一个学生告诉说一只鸟儿在教室外的树上垒了个窝。“是什么鸟呢?”我姐姐问她。“我没看到鸟儿,老师,只看到鸟窝。”那孩子回答说。“那么,你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗?”我姐姐鼓励她道。“哦,老师,就像你的头发一样。”AWomanWhoFellItwasrushhourandIwasdashingtoatraininNewYorkCity'sGrandCentralTerminal-AsInearedthegate,aplump,middle-agedwomansprintedupfrombehind,lostherfootingonthesmoothmarblefloorandslidontoherback.Hermomentumcarriedherclosetomyshoes.BeforeIcouldhelpher,however,shehadscrambledup.Gaininghercomposure,shewinkedatmeandsaid,"Doyoualwayshavebeautifulwomenfailingatyourfeet?"摔倒的女人上下班高峰期,我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。接近门口,一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来,没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚,仰面滑倒了。她的惯性使她接近了我的脚。我正准备扶她,她却自己爬了起来。她镇定了一下,对我挤了一下眉,说道:“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗?”WifeandhusbandWife:Youtellamansomething,itgoesinoneearandcomeso